Last week my husband and I had a deep conversation about ”attitudes and die hard habits” people seem to hold on to forever. They make these habits ”who they are” and say things like ”that is the way I have been living my life and that is how I will continue to live”, even if it is at the detriment of their relationships. I thought about it and realized that-it is simply not fair for one person to keep giving problems and unhappiness to the other.
Marriage is a place of ”giving and receiving”. Both persons are constantly giving and receiving from each other whether they are conscious of it or not. It is disheartening for one person to keep giving love and receiving animosity, inconsideration, anger, less appreciation, attitudes and more just because you believe this is who you are and you cannot change for the other person.
What worked for you as a person with a single status is different from what will work for you as a couple. Couples have to sit back and figure out what will work for their relationships. Because the relationship is no longer about you or me, but about ‘us’. And until couples begin to understand that and ADJUST as needed, their marriages will NOT work. Do not give all the wrong things to your partner and expect love in return. It does not work that way. Give them what you want to receive. If you want peace give them peace. If you want respect give them respect, if you want attention give them attention. Do not take your partner for granted, do not push them away because of who you think you are.
Love is fair and NEVER selfish. If you have to think about what you want always and not think about what the other person is receiving then my friend, that is selfishness. Love does not forget Itself and would never forget others.
Your assignment for the week is to take a closer look at your relationship, who is giving more and receiving less? Are you giving your spouse what you want to be given in return? Are you a dream come true for your partner or a nightmare?
May your week be blessed. 🙂
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